I recently took a drive with two of my kids to a beautiful beachfront in Northern California called Dillon Beach.
Being at the Ocean, I feel free! Laughing so hard as I skip around the beach, searching for seashells and taking in every detail of its beauty.. What a gift to be treasured…it will always be my happy place. 💙
Holding space means that you are reserving your energy to be emotionally and mentally present for yourself or others in a safe, nonjudgemental environment.
It means, setting boundaries so that you can protect your peace. Setting aside time to tune into your needs and become more self-aware. It means that you are giving yourself space to be yourself fully without judgment. To listen to your mind and body and support yourself in the best way you can.
Ways you could practice holding space for yourself could be:
• Schedule time in your regular routine to journal how you’re feeling
• Setting reminders on your phone to periodically check in with your physical and emotional state, whatever it may be, from a place of nonjudgemental loving awareness
• Practicing mindfulness, praying, meditation or breathing exercises
• Engaging in any form of self-kindness – realizing you are human and that the emotions and feelings that come with that are something to embrace, not reject or feel guilty about.
A few months ago, I was frazzled by a situation which caused others to look at me with doubting glares and accusing words that began by a simple misunderstanding.
Not being understood and discredited stirred up deep rooted memories from my childhood of not being believed when I told a trusted adult that I had been abused. At 11 years old, my self-esteem immediately plummeted as my worth was devalued deeply beneath the open wound of keeping the abuse a secret. My humanity was denied access to protection. I suffered emotionally, physically, spiritually and mentally, internalizing my pain, suppressing my feelings and silenced my voice.
I didn’t talk about it again, until I was 40 years old.
This recent situation, caused me to gravel as I continuously explained myself over and over again only to be looked at as if I wasn’t telling the truth.
My mind raced as my anger grew causing me to want to lash out at the ones who didn’t believe me.
The little girl in me was spiraling out of control, in that moment, I felt helpless.
Instead of using old self destructive ways of coping, I applied tools I’ve learned and communicated my feelings to those who misunderstood me, and I spoke my truth. We were able to clear up the confusion and move forward.
April is Sexual Assault Awareness Month, and unfortunately there are millions of survivors in the United States and around the World who are suffering from the affects of sexual assault, it is so important that we speak out against sexual assault and put an end to it.
If you are a survivor I want to let you know that, I believe you, healing is possible and there is hope.
National Sexual Assault Hotline 1-800-656-HOPE
~ denise marie
“So if the son sets you free, you will be free indeed”. – John 8:36