It’s ok…

Healing doesn’t happen linear, it ebbs and flows and many days I’m battling my mindset as I demolish thoughts that try to set off my anxiety. There are many days when I can smile and genuinely say “today’s a good day” and then there are days when I can barely get out of bed, and yet choose to say “today is a good day…to…rest. Both days are good, it’s all about my perspective and how I choose to respond to my circumstances.

“So if the son sets you free, you will be free indeed”. – John 8:36

#nolongerheldcaptive

my Saviors grace…

What does it take to be free from

the theatrical soliloquies

of carefully pre-selected words which

fall so gracefully on the ears of

those who hunger for his presence,

yet stand at the threshold and leave empty.

Stripped away from all the “wow’s” of the crowd,

to simply being in his presence.

Seeking him as I bare it all,

before the throne of my Savior’s grace,

there is where you will find me.

~ denise marie

“So if the son sets you free, you will be free indeed”. – John 8:36

#nolongerheldcaptive

I broke my silence…at 40.

A few months ago, I was frazzled by a situation which caused others to look at me with doubting glares and accusing words that began by a simple misunderstanding.

Not being understood and discredited stirred up deep rooted memories from my childhood of not being believed when I told a trusted adult that I had been abused. At 11 years old, my self-esteem immediately plummeted as my worth was devalued deeply beneath the open wound of keeping the abuse a secret. My humanity was denied access to protection. I suffered emotionally, physically, spiritually and mentally, internalizing my pain, suppressing my feelings and silenced my voice.

I didn’t talk about it again, until I was 40 years old.

This recent situation, caused me to gravel as I continuously explained myself over and over again only to be looked at as if I wasn’t telling the truth.

My mind raced as my anger grew causing me to want to lash out at the ones who didn’t believe me.

The little girl in me was spiraling out of control, in that moment, I felt helpless.

Instead of using old self destructive ways of coping, I applied tools I’ve learned and communicated my feelings to those who misunderstood me, and I spoke my truth. We were able to clear up the confusion and move forward.

April is Sexual Assault Awareness Month, and unfortunately there are millions of survivors in the United States and around the World who are suffering from the affects of sexual assault, it is so important that we speak out against sexual assault and put an end to it.

If you are a survivor I want to let you know that, I believe you, healing is possible and there is hope.

National Sexual Assault Hotline 1-800-656-HOPE

~ denise marie

“So if the son sets you free, you will be free indeed”. – John 8:36

#nolongerheldcaptive