It’s ok to get out of your comfort zone…

I decided to get out of my comfort zone and nervously read one of my poems in front of the camera.

Speaking in public or in front of a camera, causes me some anxiety and I normally find myself completely overthinking, being self-critical and sometimes talking myself out of it.

But not tonight.

I sat in my living room, didn’t fuss with the perfect application of makeup or the correct lighting. I just went for it….and because I did, it was a huge breakthrough for me!

You see, after surviving the pulmonary embolism, I struggled with the affects in my mind, emotions, and body. My brain seemed to be a bit different, very foggy, easily overwhelmed/overstimulated and anxiety. I struggled and sometimes still struggle with terrible fatigue, hair loss and extra weight gain. These things had began to mess with my confidence and I found myself beginning to hide a bit and shrink back from doing things that I used to do much easier in the past.

Being in my 50’s and a survivor of…well an overcomer of so many different challenges in my life, (past childhood trauma, stress etc.) I realize that it’s ok to not always be ok, but it’s not ok to be stuck in my circumstances. Taking things one day at a time, allows me to remove unrealistic expectations and letting go of my own pressure of perfectionism, the need to please others and making space for plenty of love and grace. Healing is a process and I am choosing to be present, every step of the way.

My hope is that I continue to show up and do things that make me uncomfortable.

This not so simple act of getting out of my own head, and doing things even if I am afraid or nervous is truly liberating.

Thanks for sharing this moment with me, it means a lot!

– denise marie

“So if the son sets you free, you will be free indeed”. – John 8:36

Just keep standing…mental health awareness.

I just wanted to send a word of encouragement out to those who are feeling weary, feeling as if they have been fighting this battle for way too long. When the thought of standing up to the health challenges, loneliness, financial strain, grief, depression, anxiety, any circumstance or situation that may have you feeling like you can’t continue on. I want you to know that you are not alone. That there is hope and help is near.

There were many days in my life that if I could just believe that it was possible for me to “just keep standing” I could. To just keep standing wasn’t necessarily always physical but yet mentally and emotionally.

On those hard days, I would call a trusted friend or family member for support, or I would schedule an appointment with my therapist. I would attend a Recovery meeting when those memories of past trauma were just too much.

And…I would go to God in prayer and read His Word, one of my favorite chapters I would read daily is Psalm 91 in which I would literally say out loud, “God you are my refuge, I know that I can trust in you, you are my strength and I am safe.”

Today, my hope and prayer is that you can “Just keep standing”.


***For immediate help please call or text the following Mental Health & Crisis line at: 988

– denise marie💗

Your presence matters…

liberation…the act of setting free

YOU matter….

Even when you feel like no one notices or cares. Your presence on this Earth is important…your voice, your opinion, your ideas, your disappointments, your shortcomings, your accomplishments, your defeats, your best qualities and your worst character defects, your talents, your stories, your laughter, your hugs, your smile. Every aspect of YOU, is a gift to this world. You are valued, cherished and needed.

And even when it doesn’t always feel like it…

I encourage you to grab on and hold tight to this truth…YOU are loved…overwhelmingly loved, undeniably loved, forever loved.💗

~ denise marie

“So if the son sets you free, you will be free indeed”. – John 8:36

holding space…for yourself.

Holding space means that you are reserving your energy to be emotionally and mentally present for yourself or others in a safe, nonjudgemental environment.

It means, setting boundaries so that you can protect your peace. Setting aside time to tune into your needs and become more self-aware. It means that you are giving yourself space to be yourself fully without judgment. To listen to your mind and body and support yourself in the best way you can.

Ways you could practice holding space for yourself could be:

• Schedule time in your regular routine to journal how you’re feeling

• Setting reminders on your phone to periodically check in with your physical and emotional state, whatever it may be, from a place of nonjudgemental loving awareness

• Practicing mindfulness, praying, meditation or breathing exercises

• Engaging in any form of self-kindness – realizing you are human and that the emotions and feelings that come with that are something to embrace, not reject or feel guilty about.

– from https://lenasamford.com/how-to-hold-space-for-yourself-and-others/

“So if the son sets you free, you will be free indeed”. – John 8:36

#nolongerheldcaptive

Painting = peace…

“I find joy in embracing vulnerability”.

Painting brings me a sense of peace. It allows me to free my mind and to be present.

“So if the son sets you free, you will be free indeed”. – John 8:36

It’s ok…

Healing doesn’t happen linear, it ebbs and flows and many days I’m battling my mindset as I demolish thoughts that try to set off my anxiety. There are many days when I can smile and genuinely say “today’s a good day” and then there are days when I can barely get out of bed, and yet choose to say “today is a good day…to…rest. Both days are good, it’s all about how I choose to respond to my circumstances.

“So if the son sets you free, you will be free indeed”. – John 8:36

#nolongerheldcaptive

I broke my silence…at 40.

A few months ago, I was frazzled by a situation which caused others to look at me with doubting glares and accusing words that began by a simple misunderstanding.

Not being understood and discredited stirred up deep rooted memories from my childhood of not being believed when I told a trusted adult that I had been abused. At 11 years old, my self-esteem immediately plummeted as my worth was devalued deeply beneath the open wound of keeping the abuse a secret. My humanity was denied access to protection. I suffered emotionally, physically, spiritually and mentally, internalizing my pain, suppressing my feelings and silenced my voice.

I didn’t talk about it again, until I was 40 years old.

This recent situation, caused me to gravel as I continuously explained myself over and over again only to be looked at as if I wasn’t telling the truth.

My mind raced as my anger grew causing me to want to lash out at the ones who didn’t believe me.

The little girl in me was spiraling out of control, in that moment, I felt helpless.

Instead of using old self destructive ways of coping, I applied tools I’ve learned and communicated my feelings to those who misunderstood me, and I spoke my truth. We were able to clear up the confusion and move forward.

April is Sexual Assault Awareness Month, and unfortunately there are millions of survivors in the United States and around the World who are suffering from the affects of sexual assault, it is so important that we speak out against sexual assault and put an end to it.

If you are a survivor I want to let you know that, I believe you, healing is possible and there is hope.

National Sexual Assault Hotline 1-800-656-HOPE

~ denise marie

“So if the son sets you free, you will be free indeed”. – John 8:36

#nolongerheldcaptive