It’s ok…

Healing doesn’t happen linear, it ebbs and flows and many days I’m battling my mindset as I demolish thoughts that try to set off my anxiety. There are many days when I can smile and genuinely say “today’s a good day” and then there are days when I can barely get out of bed, and yet choose to say “today is a good day…to…rest. Both days are good, it’s all about my perspective and how I choose to respond to my circumstances.

“So if the son sets you free, you will be free indeed”. – John 8:36

#nolongerheldcaptive

lean into his presence…

This week I was feeling a lot of anxiety. Between the pandemic, friends and family battling sickness, the loss of so many lives, the violence, the financial struggles of many, racial injustice and the chaos in our nation, I found myself struggling to hold onto my peace. My emotions fluctuating from sadness, to anger, to fear as I battled my own thoughts to bring my mindset back to a place of peace.

Then I heard a still small voice that said, “Lean into his presence.”. At that very moment I knew he was calling me to him.

One of my favorite lyrics in a song by Elevation Worship goes,

“In Your presence there is freedom
In Your presence there is hope
In Your presence there is healing
Love restores me, I am whole”.

In my moments of distress, I am learning as I lean into his presence, my anxiety surrenders to Him.

Lean into his presence.

~ denise marie

“So if the son sets you free, you will be free indeed”. – John 8:36

**side note**: I am a firm believer in Jesus and Therapy! God provides us with resources that if we are willing, can come alongside us and help us in our journey. My regular appointments with my therapist and support from my sponsor in Celebrate Recovery, are vital parts of my healing!💗

When the waves come crashing…I will trust you.

“Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders. Let me walk upon the waters
Wherever You would call me,
Take me deeper than my feet
could ever wander
And my faith will be made stronger
In the presence of my Savior”.
⁃ Oceans by Hillsong United

This summer, I had an overwhelming need to go to the Ocean, so I told my husband and the next day we drove to Santa Cruz.

As I stood there on these rocks on the beach, I watched the water go from calm to all of a sudden the waves came crashing violently and then the calmness of the water subsided as the waves went back out to sea.

I was so fortunate to capture this photo at the exact moment of impact.

As I watched in awe, I heard God sweetly whisper, “trust me”.

Unbeknownst to me, my life would change four days later, when I survived a pulmonary embolism.

As I heal, this picture is a constant reminder of how we all face the unexpected crashing of overwhelming situations that disrupt our life. But even in those uncertain times, God promises to be our firm foundation, as he continuously whispers “trust me”.

“The LORD is my rock, my fortress, and my savior; my God is my rock, in whom I find protection. He is my shield, the power that saves me, and my place of safety”.

– Psalm 18:2

~ denise marie

“So if the son sets you free, you will be free indeed”. – John 8:36 #nolongerheldcaptive

Be Strong & Courageous…

My new art piece, which is one of my favorite scriptures now hangs on the wall in my bedroom. These words have been on repeat as I continue to recover. I never would have imagined that I would be adding “Survivor of Pulmonary Embolism” to my story. But nonetheless here I stand, believing Gods promises for my life even when things are hard 🙌🏽😭

I have hope and faith as I continue to say:

“I AM Strong and Courageous, I will not be afraid or discouraged for the Lord MY God will be with me wherever I go”. – Joshua 1:9💗

~ denise marie

#nolongerheldcaptive

Living in uncertain times…but there is hope.

A little break from writing poetry as I heal. I am sure I will be inspired soon with words of encouragement and hope as I reflect on my current situation. 💕

A reminder to always listen to your body….I was discharged from the hospital yesterday and am home recovering and resting.

Went to the ER with shortness of breath and extreme chest pain. After a Cat scan, I was diagnosed with a blood clot in my right lung (pulmonary embolism). I still have a recovery/healing journey ahead of me, but am praising God because I am here to tell you my story!

Since this happened, I have been battling with some anxiety and some fear, but reading God’s promises, praying, listening to worship, and talking to family and friends have been a huge help!

Some scriptures that have strengthened me and reminded me to focus on hope are the following:

“So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” – Isaiah 41:10

 “When I am afraid, I put my trust in you.”  – Psalm 56:3

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” – Philippians 4:6-7

“The Lord is my light and my salvation—whom shall I fear?  The Lord is the stronghold of my life—of whom shall I be afraid?” – Psalm 27:1

“He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.  I will say of the Lord, “He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.”…He will cover you with his feathers, and under his wings you will find refuge; his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart.  You will not fear the terror of night, nor the arrow that flies by day, nor the pestilence that stalks in the darkness, nor the plague that destroys at midday.  A thousand may fall at your side, ten thousand at your right hand, but it will not come near you…For he will command his angels concerning you, to guard you in all your ways…“Because he loves me,” says the Lord, “I will rescue him; I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name.  He will call upon me, and I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble, I will deliver him and honor him…” – Psalm 91:1-16

Please keep me and my family in your prayers.

Denise🌸

Trauma…

Healing from trauma is a one day at a time process, and is never a “one size fits all” approach. The stigma behind mental illness continues to keep people suffering in silence. If you are hurting, please reach out to the following hotline for help, support or someone just to talk to:

1-800-273-TALK (8255)

You are not alone, you matter and God loves you.

“So if the son sets you free, you will be free indeed”. – John 8:36

#nolongerhedcaptive