Today, April 11th is my Birthday. One of the ways I choose to celebrate, is by reflecting on my journey. In the midst of working through the healing of being a Survivor of childhood sexual abuse and rape, I want to give tribute to My Mother’s Love on the day I was born.
She looked into her daughters big brown eyes, lightly kissing the dusting of light brown hair on her head. Whispering softly how loved and honored she was to hold her only daughter. Anticipating with excitement all of the hopes, and dreams of a wonderful life for, Denise Marie. Without blemish or imperfection, Adorned with Beauty and Grace. She was the love of her life, the beat of her heart, the precious connection that would never be torn apart. The immeasurable amount of Love she deposited into her daughter’s life, equipped Denise with the unyielding Strength she would need to endure the things to come.
The Powerful, Never Ending, Love of my Mother carried me through the darkest times of my life. A few months ago, I shared my entire story of my childhood sexual abuse and rape with my Mom. It was time for me to no longer deceptively, hide the truth from her. As difficult as it was for me to tell her, she needed to hear my secrets. The shame, guilt and fear tried to overcome me as I began to share my story. All of the lies I used to cover up the Truth tried to rise up in me, and shy me away from being completly honest. I wanted to protect her heart from the pain. But I knew, in order for me to be free, I had to tell her every ugly detail of the abuse, and who the abusers were. As I spoke, the fear within me, began to be replaced with her amazing Love for me. She intently listened to me, without interruption, without judgement, and without making excuses as to why she did not know I was being abused. She understood that this was my appointed time to release 40 years of hidden pain and at that very moment of vulnerability she chose to simply Love me. Today, I Continue to Embrace My Healing Journey and Completly Celebrate ME!
Denise Boyd Copyright ©
No longer held captive 
Thank you Michelle! You are right, Everyday, is a celebration of stepping into a new Me. Even if it is just a quick glimmer in the midst of my day. I will always remember to Celebrate not only the big Victories, but the small one’s as well.
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Happy belated birthday! I do hope you had a wonderful celebration and remember, you don’t have to stop celebrating just because your birthday passed. You are stepping into a new you and every day forward is a day to celebrate.
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I’m so sorry I’m late to wish you a happy birthday.
Your post has touched my heart, and I remembered the day I tried to tell my mother about the abuse. She was in the kitchen, she was cooking. She mentioned that person who was abusing me, so I said it. I told her. I’m sure she heard me, but didn’t even look at me and went on her cooking 😦
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Hi Nikky,
Thank you for the Bday wish! I am so sorry to hear of your Mom’s response. Just know that I can feel your pain and really want you to know that you have to keep pushing forward in your healing. As much as we want everyone to love and support us in our healing journey or when we “expose” the truth. It might not happen. Healing is for YOU. Please know so many people are cheering you on from the sidelines and believing for your Victory over the past and in your current situation. Hugs!!!
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Thank you so much. Lots of love 🙂
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